Well a few years ago these here timeshare people were making a right damn hassle of themselves with me. They kept on calling up to 3 times a week. So I decided I had enough and accepted.
Well the Friday rolled around and the lady only called 3 times that day to make sure I will be atendind.
Now you guys all know those comfortable clothes you have to work in the garden. And those sneakers your wife keeps on throwing out that just magically apears back in the cupboard. Well I was wearing them. I would have made people of Wallmart proud.
So I get there and all the people start staring at me. Luckily I knew nobody there and even if I did - lets just say my friends know me
So they have these here Bubbly glasses full of bubbly stuff. Propably the swills of a wine barrel that they soda streamed. I downed about 3 of them. (Gladly that stuff was horrible) and toured the finger food table stuffing my face - and pockets. By this time a group of salespeople was gathering and playing a game of Rock-paper-scisors and the loser came over to see if I was on the list. Yep there next to the gold star.
Somebody says the lecture is about to start and will we take our seats. I decide to sit in the middle. I take 2 extra glasses of the swill with me and a quick tour of the food plates refill my pockets. So there I am sitting surrounded by empty seats. Every now and again I go hunting in my pockets for another Pig-in-a-blanket and noisily sip swill. After about the third question the guy decides not to have anymore question times till afterwards. It goes really fast with the guy glancing regularly in my direction. I hope he apreciated my scratching myself.
So about 20 minutes later the hasty sales pitch is over and the Carrion birds come to seal the deal. I look for my appointed buzzard but he is standing one side arguing with the manager so I walk over and tell em Thanks it was great and how much will a week cost. After they mentioned an absurd amount I say I dont think I can afford that and a relieved looking buzzard says that is so sad. I do tell em That I and my wife and 7 kids might be interested in a family package later the year and they should call us in a few months so we can all come for the next lecture.
Its been 5 years and they have never called back!